You aren’t born with a sense of self-loathing. Self-hatred and negative self talk is something which you learn over time through subtle cues, imitating others’ behaviors, and blatant, direct conversations. When you are young, you are learning to understand different tones of voice, facial expressions, and associated words with actions and behaviors. People develop a negative voice in their heads from their parents, their family members, teachers in school, bullies, and more. As a growing young person, you only have a developing sense of self. Until you are more assured in who you are, you might fall prey to the negative things people have to say about you. Growing up in an environment where you receive less encouragement and support than you do criticism can contribute to having a skewed sense of self. If you aren’t taught how to love yourself and be nice to yourself, you aren’t going to know how. Self-love, self-kindness, and self-compassion aren’t exactly primary subjects in school. Criticism, comparison, and competing, feel as real as math, literature, and history.
The inner critic is the voice which develops over time and lives in the back of your mind. It undermines everything you try to do and who you try to be. For each person, the inner critic is different. Almost everyone experiences their inner critic in a negative way. Common sentiments of the inner critic can include
- You’re not good enough
- You’ll never succeed
- You are damaged
- You are worthless
- You’re a failure
- You can’t do anything right
Most people live with as well as in spite of their inner critic. Many others, however, struggle under it’s punishing rule. The inner critic can lead to self-sabotaging behaviors most notably including drug and alcohol addiction. Listening to the inner-critic is like putting energy into a self-fulfilling prophecy. The inner critic says you’ll fail, so you subconsciously find a way to sabotage your efforts.
Overcoming the inner critic is possible through recovery. As you recover, you learn to find value in who you are and everything you do. You identify who’s voice it really is inside your head. Given the choice, you wouldn’t choose to treat yourself that way. Recovery gives you the strength and empowerment you deserve to live a happy and successful life in recovery.
Sound Recovery Solutions wants to help you create the best version of yourself you’ve ever been. Our treatment programs are rooted in leadership and personal development, supported by a strong clinical therapy program and alternative methods of healing. For more information, call 561-666-7427.