Life is not always fair. It’s not just on the playground as a kid, but on the playground of life that we figure this out. Welcome to adulting 101, now it’s time to learn how to cope like a real adult while giving up the tantrums and starting to address the real issues at play. Sometimes acceptance is the only way to go.
The real issue is likely not that life is not fair, it’s that you feel you’ve been dealt an unfair hand at life, unlike everyone else. Maybe you are a people pleaser and try to make everyone else around you happy at your own expense. Perhaps you work too much, give too much to people besides yourself and feel burned out. This can lead to mental health issues, addiction, and lots of other challenges. It is not necessarily that you are given an unfair hand, it’s that you need coping strategies that support living a better life when difficult things happen rather than numbing out and turning to negative coping mechanisms.
Take a line from the Britney song and just ‘do something.’ It is easier said than done, isn’t it? Once you accept the fact you are not like many people who can handle work stress, or you are not like your neighbor who can work 100 hours a week, then you can accept your adulting status and move on. When life changes, try to adapt rather than fight against it. When you spend time caring for yourself, you start meeting your own needs and becoming aware of how to tap into self care rather than self-flagellation and negative behavioral and thought patterns.
When mental health issues or other things take over your life, it can feel hard to ask for help. When you reach out, you feel less alone than you think you are and you may find people actually like helping you. Altruism is one of the main factors in achieving happiness. Find a way to release responsibility for caring for everyone else and just let them help you.
Other people can help you if you let them by teaching how to cope. Maybe you are angry you can’t change your circumstances, but you don’t have to go through life angry. Focus on learning from others who have gone ahead of you and know how to cope with some of the challenges.
Change what you can and accept the rest. There is no treatment for addiction that cures you forever. There is no permanent cure for mental health issues. There are coping and management techniques and embracing it may make you feel lighter and more energetic. When you embrace the shadow and light sides, you will feel better and start to move forward in healing.
Sound Recovery helps you focus on accepting what you cannot change and seeking help for the rest. The rest being recovery from addiction and healing from trauma. Our resources, support, and therapeutic staff can help guide your journey. If you are struggling with addiction, let us help. Call us at 561-277-3088 to get started.